On the very same night that legendary American author Kurt Vonnegut lost his virginity, and without connection to that event whatsoever, Johan Konundrum was spawned. The term spawned is used specifically here, as unlike most human children, Johan came into existence as an unfertilized egg sac placed in a safe location outside of the womb. His father then fertilized the egg sac and, much like the sea horse, carried Johan in his fleshy pouch until it was time for him to be born. Unfortunately, government by-laws concerning spawned citizens forced his parents to give him up at an early age, whereafter he became a ward of the state.
Even during his formative years under the care of the federal government, Johan displayed an acute talent in the psychic experiments he underwent at his foster home in Arlington, Virginia. At age 17 he enrolled in the secret government organization “The New Earth Army”, where he gained the attention of notorious maverick Bill Django.
Several factors, including the U.S. military policies on the use of hallucinogens, and his own personal ennui, led to Johan Konundrum’s resignation from the program at age 24. He then adopted the idiom of American icon and LSD enthusiast Timothy Leary, who famously stated “Turn on, tune in, drop out”.
After years of tuning his mind to the outer regions of space and time, his life’s purpose finally came to him. The sounds and messages he gathered all seemed to point to the same direction. Psychedelic trance, and a non-profit record label. Johan is currently working on his newest project from his personal cabin on Olympus Mons, Mars. He also enjoys intercourse and defenestration.
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